Halloween 2011

Our trick-or-treat caravan grew by one this year with the addition of Darwin to the troupe. Unfortunately, Darwin's custom made Cat in the Hat headpiece lasted from the front porch to the driveway. I should have known better. With his winter hat on instead, I think Darwin looked like some sort of weird Ewok.

The costume making went well (minus a couple all nighters to meet the deadline). Next year the costume making begins in August. Special thanks to Curt, our electrical engineer we keep on retainer for things like way cool robot lighting.

Size Matters

Taxation without representation, indeed.  The kids brought in quite the Halloween haul this year and I've had to familiarize them with the "dad tax" on their trick-or-treat bounty.  Unfortunately for them, since I made their costumes and took them on their beggar's night rounds, they fall into a very high tax bracket.  Current tax legislation also applies the "dad tax" to Easter baskets, ice cream cones, bowls of popcorn and, of course, McDonald's french fries.  Sure it sounds like an onerous burden, but c'mon, those piggy back rides and really high pushes on the swings aren't going to pay for themselves.

Freedom isn't free, baby.

Regrettably, it doesn't look like tax rates will be easing any time soon.  Have you seen the atrocities that are being passed off as "fun size" candy these days?  It's a joke. They're an abomination.  The Great Pumpkin must be rolling over in his patch.  And who pays for these crimes?  The children.  I have to dip into their candy bowls dozens of times a day just to keep my blood sugar up.  The kids are left with little else than Tootsie Rolls and marshmallow peanuts.  Maybe a half-melted Jolly Rancher if they're lucky.

I have a feeling things are only going to get worse.

Based on current trends, this will be a "fun size" Snickers in the year 2018.

Justice League

Following the lead of the big brother of the fam, our crew was transformed into a few superheroes (and one super-villain) for Halloween this year.

Jameson decided months ago that he would be trick-or-treating as Batman.  But not just any Batman... LEGO Batman.  It was hilarious to watch him explain to many an unwitting adult that he was not regular Batman while nearly every boy aged 5 and up immediately recognized him as the little plastic caped crusader from the excellent LEGO Batman video game.  He even evoked some serious envy from a couple of older boys who gave their mom a disappointed glance while wearing their homemade costumes of plain old LEGO blocks.  And on at least one occasion, a youngish husband jumped in on Jameson's behalf when the youngish wife misspoke.  "Aww, what a cute Batman you are."  "Honey, he's actually LEGO Batman.  Nice costume, dude."

Prior to the actual night of trick-or-treating, Truman seemed only marginally interested in this supposed upcoming holiday.  Halloween?  Never heard of it.  Seeming to just want to go with the flow, he took a cue from Jameson and opted for a Superman costume.  Despite his apparent lack of enthusiasm leading up to the big night, Truman turned out to be the most enthusiastic trick-or-treater I've ever seen.  As if shocked back to lucidity with a heavy dose of caramel dipped smelling salts, Truman suddenly became a sweets seeking T-800 that would stop at nothing to fill his candy bag.  Since then, he asks at least once a day to go trick-or-treating.

With the superhero theme setting in, Amelia simply had to take on the role as the Joker.  The hair. The attitude.  The cunning.  It was a casting no-brainer.  She relished the opportunity.  She was willing to accept time in the makeup chair and she had the Heath Ledger stare down pat.  Those who know her well understood a fairy or princess costume simply wouldn't do.

And then of course Darwin.  Our little Robin.  Though lacking the proper yellow cape, I think he pulled off the Boy Wonder quite well.

We went with homemade costumes for all but Truman.  At first I didn't think that not making Truman's costume would matter since we already had a Superman outfit on hand. Later I felt bad because the costume making became a big deal and Jameson and Amelia were very excited about the process.  Now that Truman "gets" Halloween, his costume will have to be top priority next year.

I'm a proponent of making costumes when possible.  I really like the challenge of deciding on a costume and then trying to figure out a way to pull it off.  That's pure enjoyment for me.  It also got the kids much more interested in the idea of dressing up for the holiday. Jameson's outfit was fashioned from a Target diaper box and some discounted fabric.  My mom put some sewing skills to work on Amelia's Joker jacket.  And even Darwin's little get up required some dark t-shirt iron-on transfer printer paper.  (By the way, dark t-shirt iron-on transfer printer paper is, besides a mouthful, the best thing ever.  Seriously.  I've used it for so many projects with the kids.  And maybe even one for myself.)  I drew the Batman and Robin logos and details using free software at Aviary.com.  The files are linked at the bottom of this post and you're welcome to use them if you have a need to create your own Dynamic Duo.

Halloween rocks.  Can't wait for next year.  Jameson says he's already decided on Harry Potter as his costume. Don't worry Truman and Amelia -- this doesn't mean you have to be Hermione and Ron. But boy, wouldn't Darwin make a cute Hedwig?

Oh, and by the way, Target already had their Christmas wares on display yesterday.

The Gray Plastic Knight

Little known power: The Super Sneeze

Little effort required to get in character.

Ready and willing to soil a diaper in the name of justice.

"Batman never lets me go on the fun missions."

The showdown.

Free Batman and Robin iron-on logos.  Don't say I never gave you anything!

Robin Logo.egg by James on Aviary



Bat Symbol.egg by James on Aviary

Why So Serious?

More Halloween pictures to come...

Pumpkin Patch

Guess what.  Kids like buying pumpkins.  We went to a local farm to select some primo jack-o-lantern gourds and the kids just kept loading more and more pumpkins into the shopping wagon.  They were dropping them in faster than we could take them out.

There was one exception.  Truman, once again showed his nonconformist side.  As soon as we hopped out of the car, he made a beeline for a huge pile of small pumpkins.  He immediately started lining them up.  He was entranced.  His focus, planning and determination are sometimes such a contrast to his ants-in-the-pants brothers and sister.  It's so interesting and strangely delightful to watch him go to work.

Truman didn't say a word.  He just got to work on his project.

"I <3 pumpkins."

"Let's get this one, too."

"And these."

Contrary to popular belief, not all kids are sprouted in cabbage patches.

Everyone smiling and looking at the camera.  So close, yet so far away.

Halloween Help

Does anyone know of any face paints that are particularly safe for kids?  I've heard that most Halloween face paints have pretty nasty things in them.

Birds of War

Next year's Halloween costume will be brought to you by It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

Birds of War!

Dignity

"For the love of Ichabod, please put me out of my misery. Put the Christmas lights up already. I'm begging you. Please."

What You're Really Here For

OK, enough of that adult Halloween nonsense. Back to our regularly scheduled cuteness.

Sexy Time!

When you have four kids, making plans for Halloween partying can be a last minute undertaking. As with most aspects of our social life, it's all dependent on the babysitting situation. This weekend, Julie's parents came through for us and we got to attend a real live Halloween party. (Thank you!) Of course, we didn't cement our plans until the last minute and that made for some rushed costume plans. Like the night before Halloween rushed. The end result was Julie as some sort of white trash housewife with a big plastic wig that made her look like she was out of the Simpsons. My limited costume choices led to the merging of a Borat wig and mustache with an "ancient warrior" get up. I was "Boratacus." I think maybe I looked more like a 1st century Rick James. Whatever. I'll plan ahead next year. For those of you not in the know, the orange costume that my brother Kip is sporting below is DJ Lance Rock, from Yo Gabba Gabba! See the origin of DJ Lance here. (By the way, I'd rather go to this than a Wiggles concert any day.)

The party was great. Lots of great food and lots of alcohol. Both of which I had too much. Especially the alcohol. Let's just say it was a bumpy ride home. And let's just say that moving my sister into her new apartment this morning was the last thing I wanted to be doing. I am officially way too old for things like beer pong, jello shots and ice luges. I was officially too old for those things years ago, but I had to check one more time, just in case. Yes, way too old.

By the way, the ice luges weren't just your run of the mill blocks of ice. They were, um, shaped. Like things. I'm definitely, definitely too old for this.

Warning, the following pictures may offend some clergymen, Republicans and kindergarten teachers.

Melon Farmer

Jameson grew his own pumpkin this year. By grew, I mean he and Julie threw some pumpkin seeds in my parents' pseudo-garden in their back yard. That was pretty much it. Somehow, amazingly, a lone pumpkin actually developed. I'm no pumpkin expert (though I've been told my head resembles one), but this one turned out pretty good. It was at least good enough to carve into a jack-o'-lantern. Good size and shape. Nice color. Only mildly nibbled on by back yard rodents. Minimal bug infestation. A real prize winner.

It kind of makes me think all these pumpkin sellers around town are big scam artists. Whatever they're charging for pumpkins, it's got to be a rip-off. If we could grow this thing with our careful neglect and disregard, how are they getting away with charging anything for them. I mean, pumpkins are apparently one step above a weed. If it weren't for Halloween, they'd probably be considered a nuisance species.

Anyway. Having completely forgotten about it, Jameson was pretty excited to find this thing resting in my parents dirt garden the other day. We brought it home and Jameson drew up the plans for the jack-o'-lantern. I, as usual, did all the hard work and carved it. Four years of age is plenty old enough to handle a butcher knife where I come from. Kids today are so soft. Jameson doesn't have to cut down his own Christmas tree either, but that's another story. I guess it's OK though. The Dad Tax on trick-or-treat candy is going to be higher than usual this year.

Halloween

I would say this Halloween was really Jameson's first since he actually got to participate in the begging for candy this year. He was a little nervous at the first house, but once he realized his efforts would yield a bucket full of candy he took his costume literally, urging "run, dadda, run!" To the unfamiliar, Jameson went as "Dash" from The Incredibles. This was a homemade costume. It didn't turn out too bad. There was a mask, too, but while he refused to take it off the night before Halloween, he refused to put it on the night of Halloween.