Rules of Engagement

Unfortunately for me, Amelia already likes to argue. And she doesn't follow the rules of arguing as spelled out in any of the 117 Yahoo! relationship articles on the top ten ways to fight fairly and maintain a healthy marriage. Does she not get relationship advice from the internet like the rest of western civilization?

Most of my arguments with Amelia occur when she's been busted for one misdeed or another. Her first line of defense is to remind me of my own failures as a father, husband or human being in general. She apparently catalogs these things for later use when I confront her about her actions. Sadly, she's quite good at it -- she may be the one who wrote on the wall but somehow I'm the one in timeout for sneaking a piece of candy before dinner two nights ago. She hasn't even reached her fifth birthday and she's already a formidable opponent. I really don't need more women in my life who can run verbal circles around me at will. By the time she's thirteen I may just go into hiding.

I often use this blog to document the things my kids say, but mere written words would not do justice to Amelia's retort from a few days ago. I was reprimanding her for something (which I've already forgotten -- see how good she is at this???) when suddenly she turned into Jerry Stiller with a photographic memory of my past transgressions. Here is my impression of her response.




What could I say? Sunflower seeds are disgusting.

How Old Are Your Ears?

As you get older, the range of sounds that you can hear gets smaller and smaller. Eventually, very high frequency sounds become completely inaudible to your decrepit old eardrums. Teenagers exploit this limitation by setting their cellphone tones to these higher frequencies that only they can hear thus being able to receive email and text message alerts with teachers and other adults being none the wiser.

So how old are your ears? See my results and the link to the test below.

You are in your twenties

You can still hear reasonably well and you can play this without my old fart colleagues hearing it which makes you feel kinda good. The highest pitched ultrasonic mosquito ringtone that you can hear is 15.8kHz

Find out which ultrasonic ringtones you can hear!